Q. 40 year old happily married mom of 2 boys. I work in an office where the women are outnumbered roughly 5-1 but everyone gets along great and in the ten years I've been there it's been an amazing work environment.
Every Christmas we do a secret Santa gift swap and have to get 5 small, inexpensive gifts, one for each day of the week preceding Christmas. We started yesterday. Typically at the end of the week we typically do not divulge our secret identity if we don't choose to.
My dilemma is that yesterday I found a small box on my desk from my secret santa and inside it was a pair of nipple pasties in the shape of wreathes. I was shocked and rather embarrassed. This morning I found my second gift and was reluctant to open it, and when I did I found a little chrome object with a jeweled head. bit of research online showed it to be a small anal plug!! Again....a bit taken aback. This afternoon when I stepped out to mail a few things I came back and a note was on my desk saying: "I hope you are not offended by the gifts, I just saw them and thought you'd look great in them! -Secret Santa'
I have no idea who is giving me these, nor do I think I want to! Our boss is in on the secret santa thing so not sure I want to go to him and not sure I want to take it that far. Besides, my boss is a guy and he's kind of a free-wheeling type and for all I know it could be him.
By biggest question is do I tell my husband? He would be pretty upset and most likely come to my office and demand to know who it was -not a great scenario. And also, if I find out who it is should I thank them and laugh it off as a joke and then tell my husband?
Never been in this position....
Edit: I might have believed it was a 'gag gift' if not for the note. A 'gag gift' might have been one item, but not two..and who knows? I might get similar items all 5 days. Not so sure I want one of my male co-workers picturing me in pasties and anal jewelry!
Every Christmas we do a secret Santa gift swap and have to get 5 small, inexpensive gifts, one for each day of the week preceding Christmas. We started yesterday. Typically at the end of the week we typically do not divulge our secret identity if we don't choose to.
My dilemma is that yesterday I found a small box on my desk from my secret santa and inside it was a pair of nipple pasties in the shape of wreathes. I was shocked and rather embarrassed. This morning I found my second gift and was reluctant to open it, and when I did I found a little chrome object with a jeweled head. bit of research online showed it to be a small anal plug!! Again....a bit taken aback. This afternoon when I stepped out to mail a few things I came back and a note was on my desk saying: "I hope you are not offended by the gifts, I just saw them and thought you'd look great in them! -Secret Santa'
I have no idea who is giving me these, nor do I think I want to! Our boss is in on the secret santa thing so not sure I want to go to him and not sure I want to take it that far. Besides, my boss is a guy and he's kind of a free-wheeling type and for all I know it could be him.
By biggest question is do I tell my husband? He would be pretty upset and most likely come to my office and demand to know who it was -not a great scenario. And also, if I find out who it is should I thank them and laugh it off as a joke and then tell my husband?
Never been in this position....
Edit: I might have believed it was a 'gag gift' if not for the note. A 'gag gift' might have been one item, but not two..and who knows? I might get similar items all 5 days. Not so sure I want one of my male co-workers picturing me in pasties and anal jewelry!
A. Those objects and the note fall well within the EEOC guidelines defining sexual harassment. You are well within your rights to report the matter to your employer. If the employer does not take action to prevent another occurrence, you can legally sue the employer for sexual harassment.
Keep in mind the only thing your employer could do to prevent another occurrence when the perpetrator is unknown, is to end the Secret Santa gift exchange. This will make you very unpopular with the other employees.
If you wish to retain your friendship with the employees who are Not sexually harassing you, it might be best to make a public display of looking in the boxes, then throwing them directly into the garbage can. You can bet your last dollar that your Secret Santa is watching to see how you react to his gifts. This should give him the message loud and clear.
If you decide Not to complain to management, don't tell your husband. No need of making him mad and causing a scene at work. Get rid of the items, if you keep them you will have some tall explaining to do if he finds them.
If you do decide to complain to management, by all means, tell your husband as he is going to find out when EEOC interviews him. If you decide to file an EEOC complaint, keep the items and notes for evidence.
Keep in mind the only thing your employer could do to prevent another occurrence when the perpetrator is unknown, is to end the Secret Santa gift exchange. This will make you very unpopular with the other employees.
If you wish to retain your friendship with the employees who are Not sexually harassing you, it might be best to make a public display of looking in the boxes, then throwing them directly into the garbage can. You can bet your last dollar that your Secret Santa is watching to see how you react to his gifts. This should give him the message loud and clear.
If you decide Not to complain to management, don't tell your husband. No need of making him mad and causing a scene at work. Get rid of the items, if you keep them you will have some tall explaining to do if he finds them.
If you do decide to complain to management, by all means, tell your husband as he is going to find out when EEOC interviews him. If you decide to file an EEOC complaint, keep the items and notes for evidence.
What should i get my boyfriends parents for christmas?
Q. Im not looking to spending a lot,they are well off, and his mom has kind of expensive taste. His dad on the other hand, is the complete opposite. She loves to cook and try new things. I have been dating their 16 year old son for 5 months, and i love his family..They are great to me, and i just want to get them something thats nice, something they will use. Im not a big sentimental person either..I was thinking of getting his mom a bath and body works basket, but i think it will be easier to just get them together 1 gift, unless you have ideas for his dad! HELP PLEASE!
A. I think the B&B gift basket may be inappropriate because you haven't known them long(5 months) and also you are younger. For now, I think you should do general simple gifts and later down the line you can start giving more personal gifts. Try something Christmas oriented. What about a nice ornament engraved with the family name(Things Remembered or Red Envelope.com norm have a nice selection of these for under $30). Or how about making/buying a Christmas gift basket with nice chocolates, etc. in it. Good luck
I am think about making gift baskets for people in my family for Christmas?
Q. Any ideas would be great.
I'm doing one for my sister and her husband and they have a 5 year old boy and a newborn girl- I want to make one basket for all of them.
One for my parents in law
and one for my mother- she just had her birthday and we got her a digital camera
I'm doing one for my sister and her husband and they have a 5 year old boy and a newborn girl- I want to make one basket for all of them.
One for my parents in law
and one for my mother- she just had her birthday and we got her a digital camera
A. Gift baskets can be so fun, you can do assorted flavor teas or coffees, hot chocolates, assorted snack cookies or baked goods, wine, for those with children include age appropriate toys (small ones) or an outfit. Jams, preserves or jellies, muffin or bread mixes. For the person you bought the digital camera for,include a small photo album, some small picture frames a package of batteries etc.
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Title Post: What to do about sexually inappropriate 'secret santa' gifts at work?
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Rating: 96% based on 976 ratings. 4,8 user reviews.
Author: Unknown
Thanks For Coming To My Blog
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