How can I help my mum straighten up?

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Winsop

I certainly hope that I don't sound like an annoyingly angsty teen, because while I am a teen, I don't consider myself anguished in any way. On to the point. Well, my mum needs to straighten up. I absolutely understand that many parents have economic problems over them every day and perhaps kids (I have two brothers), but I feel that it shouldn't deter someone from being correct towards someone.
Now, there's a huge difference between my brothers and I. My older brother and I are well-educated and we know how to respect. My younger brother (He's 12, mind you. However, this isn't the reason for what I'm about to say) is horrible in school. He gets into trouble every day and is awfully disrespectful towards us. In fact, the little bugger got detention a few weeks ago for disrespecting a teacher.
At this point, I hope, any mother would have punished their child if they did something like that. Perhaps grounding them without television, or putting them to study for a long time? At least a serious talk? Well, not with my mum. Technically she did "punish" him by telling him that he couldn't watch television and that he had to complete all of his homework (which he should have been doing in the first place), but mum never enforces these rules. She's like a lawman who sets down the law without actually enforcing it.
The kid's not getting disciplined! The very next weekend, when he asks mum if he could go skating with his friends, she lets him go! Every. Bloody. Time. In fact, I tried confronting her about her lack of discipline, because he was turning into a freaking delinquent! Mum just avoids the question or makes an excuse like: "It was special. His friend was moving out tomorrow."

Now, here is where I might sound a bit bratty, but I've had enough. As said earlier, my younger brother has no respect for anything, humans animals and things alike. A few months ago, my mum comes up to me and asks me to let him use my PS3...Excuse me? You want me to let that disrespecting, arrogant, break-everything kid use a PS3 and the games that I bought with my own money? I told her, strictly, no. Mum lost it. I understand the rant she gave me about being unfair and how I should share, but I believe I had a perfectly good reason. A few weeks earlier, he busted my Gamecube and a few games that now-a-days, you have to pay up to $70.00 to find again because they are no longer sold in Gamestop.
Anyways, after a long argument with mum, I had to surrender my PS3 and the games. I was infuriated, especially because I had gotten that system as a gift for Christmas years earlier. And that mum OFFICIALLY GAVE MY BLOODY CHRISTMAS PRESENT AND ALL MY GAMES TO HIM.

So, my younger brother disrespects a teacher and gets no punishment. However, I clearly answer her question of "May Alex use the PS3?" with a well-backed up no, and my entire system gets robbed from me. I mean...if you were going to force me to let him use it, why bloody ask me in the first place?

Answer
Your mother is lacking personal boundaries for herself and with her kids, especially your. Go on-line and look up personal boundaries and talk to your mother about them Here is one site to get you started; http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/06/29/how-to-create-healthy-boundaries/.
Good luck

I live in Texas, the father lives in Indiana our divorce was final in Indiana.?

iluvmeyebo

I was granted full custody and he has visitation rights and child support obligations. He is currently behind in child support, has never sent gifts for birthdays or christmas and only saw them 16 hours in the year 2012(travel expenses all mine, even though according to our decree he is to meet me in Arkansas for the exchange of the boys). I have lived in Texas(granted by the courts and recommended by GAL) since July 2011, so first question: Does Texas now have jurisdiction over my children? and second: Is the lack of motivation to see his children in the past 19 months give me grounds to terminate his parental rights so my husband may adopt them?

As for why I feel it would be in the best interest of the child; he consistently disappoints my children by refusing to pick them up for visitation, he is now married to a known publicly recorded methadone patient, both he and his wife TRY to stir up drama in my household just for spite. I had an abusive marriage, I left for good reason but I have always been more than fair with the boys up to and including providing food, rental assistance, phone payments, and car insurance to enable him to have a relationship with our sons. I truly can't believe the man he became and how little of a father he is. I would never cut him out completely, if he said he was available to visit with them in Texas I would allow it, I would still allow phone calls. What would be different is: him no longer paying support or in his case racking up an arrearage, I could enroll my children in summer programs that I currently do not due to never knowing IF he will want to have his visitation of 7 weeks, I would not fear him gaining custody of the boys in the event of my untimely death, as well as he and his wife's motivation to cause drama should end, considering it centers around child support and visitation.

Really torn about this, please no negative mean comments. If you are totally opposed simply be nice and state why. Thank You:)

Answer
Texas can have jurisdiction if you motion the court to transfer the case to Texas. No, he still has to sign over his rights in order for the adoption to take place. Next time he is supposed to visit the kids, show up in Arkansas and wait for him. Do something fun while you're there, and make sure you take pics with the kids. Treat it as a vacation and if he shows up, hand the kids over. If he doesn't, go home with them.

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