perlanga20
Hi Everybody,
I need some advice on giving gifts. Iâm a young single woman who ideally around Christmas loves giving gifts for the kids in my extended family (mostly younger cousins). I have always gotten all the little ones gifts ever since I got a good job a few years ago, and I never expect anything in return.
This year I have decided to spend my extra income on surgery to fix a hernia I sustained as a child. Since it causes me no pain my insurance wonât cover to repair the muscle and I have to dish out thousands to fix it.
I have to budget to fix this and I think itâs well worth it but that means Iâll have to cut corners in a few areas including around xmas. Iâve decided that Iâm only giving to my immediate family (mom, dad, two brothers, and my only nephew) and my three godchildren. So that means Iâm leaving out many kids, we have a close knit circle of family and friends. I think most people will be understanding of the situation, but how do handle the question of âso and so got a gift but my son didnât if it comes upâ? Or do I let the kids parents know up front âIâm on a budget this year and couldnât get gifts for everybodyâ, âIâm having surgery and need to budgetâ? I donât feel like I should have to explain myself, but I will to avoid hurt feeling amongst the kids. What do you guys suggest?
Answer
Of course you do not have to explain yourself, but as you said, you are a close-knit family so really it is up to you. I'm sure they would understand.
In terms of your Christmas situation, there are some things that you can do.
Some would suggest to make gifts, but that can be equally as expensive (sometimes more) when you add up all of the supplies.
Here is a site link for DIY gifts under $5, if you are willing to: http://www.the36thavenue.com/2011/11/25-handmade-gifts-under-5.html
I think for kids the best ones would be the Hot Chocolate Art, Santa Party Mix, Bird Nest Necklaces, Bread in a Bottle (you can also google other recipe-in-a-jar ideas), Tea Cup Lights, Bookmarks, Baking Kit, and the Wrap It paper cones that are filled with candy.
Even if your budget is really tight, you could always opt for buying a box of candy canes to give to the kids so that at least it is something, and you don't feel bad and the kids are happy :)
You can also ask around and see if anyone wants to combine gifts so that you pay for half and they pay for half.
Of course you do not have to explain yourself, but as you said, you are a close-knit family so really it is up to you. I'm sure they would understand.
In terms of your Christmas situation, there are some things that you can do.
Some would suggest to make gifts, but that can be equally as expensive (sometimes more) when you add up all of the supplies.
Here is a site link for DIY gifts under $5, if you are willing to: http://www.the36thavenue.com/2011/11/25-handmade-gifts-under-5.html
I think for kids the best ones would be the Hot Chocolate Art, Santa Party Mix, Bird Nest Necklaces, Bread in a Bottle (you can also google other recipe-in-a-jar ideas), Tea Cup Lights, Bookmarks, Baking Kit, and the Wrap It paper cones that are filled with candy.
Even if your budget is really tight, you could always opt for buying a box of candy canes to give to the kids so that at least it is something, and you don't feel bad and the kids are happy :)
You can also ask around and see if anyone wants to combine gifts so that you pay for half and they pay for half.
How long would you stay (married women please)?
Q. I left my husband after 2 years of progressively worsening verbal and financial abuse. Alcoholism is what made him this way. After leaving ( I was going to divorce him, this wasn't just a separation for me) we talked and he said he would do anything to keep our relationship. since we are married, I told him what I would need or what, and to be honest for the last 2 months, he has done everything I have asked of him and more.
Even though he is doing all I ask, I am just not into him anymore. After being treated so poorly, I guess I put a wall around my heart. I really don't care if the marriage ends or not and I am kind of just here because of obligation. I love him, but I am no longer in love with him.
I am willing to stay in this relationship to see if I can get my old feelings back. If he continues to do the things he has been doing, its possible, however, I have been thinking about everything and to be honest, even if he does everything forever, I still kind of don't wan him anymore (but of course this is how I feel now)
I decided that if by December 2011 I still am not back in love and have no desire to stay in this relationship that i will ask for a divorce. do you think thats enough time? Would you wait longer? Shorter? Need some feedback.
Even though he is doing all I ask, I am just not into him anymore. After being treated so poorly, I guess I put a wall around my heart. I really don't care if the marriage ends or not and I am kind of just here because of obligation. I love him, but I am no longer in love with him.
I am willing to stay in this relationship to see if I can get my old feelings back. If he continues to do the things he has been doing, its possible, however, I have been thinking about everything and to be honest, even if he does everything forever, I still kind of don't wan him anymore (but of course this is how I feel now)
I decided that if by December 2011 I still am not back in love and have no desire to stay in this relationship that i will ask for a divorce. do you think thats enough time? Would you wait longer? Shorter? Need some feedback.
Answer
Woman to woman let me tell you "You have a gift" in your marriage. Do you have any idea how many men could care less about mending their marriages? He obviously has gone above and beyond as you clearly stated. So, now... Now that he has you need to remember the grass is not always greener on the other side.
You owe it to yourself YES yourself to give it another try. And you also need not put a time frame on it, "because that wont work either". If you cannot do it from your heart and it be your WHOLE heart then do him and you both a favor and don't.
I am simply telling you though think before you quit on him and your marriage.
Woman to woman let me tell you "You have a gift" in your marriage. Do you have any idea how many men could care less about mending their marriages? He obviously has gone above and beyond as you clearly stated. So, now... Now that he has you need to remember the grass is not always greener on the other side.
You owe it to yourself YES yourself to give it another try. And you also need not put a time frame on it, "because that wont work either". If you cannot do it from your heart and it be your WHOLE heart then do him and you both a favor and don't.
I am simply telling you though think before you quit on him and your marriage.
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Title Post: I can't afford xmas gifts for everyone?
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